Juggling Watermelons

Over the many years during which I have been associated with choir directors I can recall numerous occasions when I have cheerfully encouraged someone to form a new group. “Start a new choir!” I said. “It will be fun!” I said.

Starting a new choir can be a fine way to acquire added experience, gain a bit of notoriety and add some sparkle to a résumé. Indeed, in the confident belief that we can never have too many choral ensembles I have, perhaps, tossed this suggestion around a bit too freely…

Without ever intending to take my own advice, I recently found myself in the completely unexpected position of (you guessed it) starting a new choir! I’ve learned that, while the advantages are real, the process is a bit more involved than I evidently realized. Indeed, the last few months, leading up to a first rehearsal earlier this week, have been like swatting swarms of locusts in a windstorm while juggling three watermelons and an enraged electric eel, i.e., frantically busy and then every once-in-a-while you get a shock.

First of all we determined that this community didn’t need another mixed-voice group, so our new ensemble will be for men’s voices. As soon as that decision was made (and with the invaluable assistance of my devoted wife) my time has been devoted to: picking a name for the group (“The Choir Guys”…like it?), starting a Facebook page, opening a bank account (which required registering the name of the group with the Idaho Secretary of State), designing a logo, reserving the domain for TheChoirGuys.com, establishing a website, designing a fundraising brochure, calling on dozens of local businesses for their support, selecting repertoire, buying all of the 1-inch three-ring binders in stock at both of the local Walmarts, arranging for a separate phone number for calls and texts, setting up an email account, designing a poster to recruit singers, speaking to the local high school choir directors, driving all over the southwest portion of the state putting up posters, finding an appropriate rehearsal and performance venue, clearing our proposed concert date with other performing organizations and, oh yes, actually learning the new pieces we will be singing. (Why does it seem like the actual music part of the job only gets the tiny bit of time that’s left after everything else has been accomplished? Why are you laughing?)

Don’t get me wrong, I think I’m going to love directing this choir, but in the future—rather than casually suggesting someone start up a new group I think my advice will be, “Remain calm and take up knitting.”

 

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